The train came and people rushed out in clusters. A teenage girl with large headphones and a handful of gadgets smacked me with her backpack. A man in his 30’s stumbled when a radiant woman sought his embrace. I wondered if she will do the same. Will she wear an expression of glee, resolution? Or unease – my insides iced at the thought. The conductor held a bent woman’s bag, escorting her to the exit. I stared at the dispersing crowd, waiting for the verdict to arrive with her face. The last groups walked, chatted and laughed. She wasn’t there.
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I am not sure how it all came about but I took notice as it turned into a poke in the eye. Opinions I was hearing myself say in various conversations had little in common, other than me proving that I was certain about myself and the world.
It is not that I had an agenda to lie; I wasn’t consciously trying to hide or alter anything about myself. Yet, every now and then I was finding myself talking – all the more, defending certain beliefs – while on the inside wondering: WHY am I saying this?
The spider-web of human desire for certainty…
(Part II – to be continued)
Read Part I here
Many people don’t know who they are.
Then there are those who are married to established ideas of themselves and attached to others.
Majority of us, whatever our fitting on identity scale, spends the days hunting for chains, ropes and spider webs to get tangled in.
You see, in the 21st century on Earth, not being certain or at least pretending about who we are is a sin that echoes with being a loser…
(Part I – to be continued)
A specialty and a frailty, a capacity and a railing; hardly invited to ether, unwelcome to be, each person’s fashion of seeing the world was one of a kind, fascinating and blindly limiting.
Ashamed to put it on display, people wore brain uniforms instead – all glossy and adorned – restraining their inborn edges.
Once upon a time in the land of regulated frameworks, no one noticed when the Big Brother freely moved his belongings out of the living-room TV.